So as I am sitting down yesterday for my ummmm…4th pee of the day (at work), and as usual I use the toilet seat covers (first pull up, then pull down) I felt a bit of urgency and really needed to go PEE!! There it was, coming out in a rushhhhhhhh!! And IMMEDIATELY I realize that something is NOT RIGHT! I stop. Wait. Look down. And notice a small puddle had formed on the floor beneath me. SURE AS SHIT the dang toilet seat cover did not tear in its appropriate tearing place! My pee must have come out so quickly that it just rolled along the top of the thin sheet! This has happened here at work once before. And at that time, I had decided that I needed to help the toilet seat cover by tearing the front just enough to not fall into the toilet before I sat down, but enough to tear without question as I began to pee…..slowly.
SO! I slowly began to pee, which sucks to pee slowly when you are pregnant and need to go quite badly, but it’s what I did. I finish and get up to see a small puddle on the floor, and a small quarter sized dot of darkness on my jeans. FUCK! I clean everything up, wash my hands, and inspect the back of my pants. Nothing got on my panties (okay, let’s be honest, I am 6 months pregnant and REALLY not wearing panties anymore, they are more like granny panties, briefs, articles of clothing I would not otherwise be found DEAD in!) But, big as they are, they somehow avoided the spray.
I was, essentially, forced to wear mah dirty pee pants for the rest of the day!!
Ahhh the joys of pregnancy!
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